Valentine
by bananafishies
Summary: This is a reply to a challenge found in the forums here. It's Valentine's Day in London. Mrs. Lovett is happy. Sweeney is not. Rated T just in case. One-shot.


Sweeney stared dully out the window

Sweeney stared dully out the window. It was Friday the thirteenth. Unfortunately, such a day was to be followed by the day of love, a day of romance and passion (so Mrs. Lovett claimed), the day Cupid's arrows pierced everyone's heart: Valentine's Day. Or as Sweeney called it, Hell.

Mrs. Lovett had been planning for weeks in advance, going so far as to suggest that Sweeney purchase a pink scarf and wear it while he worked. "And maybe, love," she had purred in what she hoped was a seductive tone (it wasn't), "You could take a break from, well, 'elping me wiv the pies? Just for a day? So you won't ruin your new scarf?"

He had informed her quite frankly that he had no intention of purchasing such a stupid garment and, furthermore, he planned to kill just as many customers as he did normally. Mrs. Lovett had scowled and flounced away, leaving Sweeney snorting with laughter when her brand new dress caught on a splinter in the floor, ripping her skirt clean in two.

Sweeney sighed contentedly as he remembered the spectacle she had made when she was forced to step outside for a few seconds when she went back into her shop to change. Of course, she would probably take revenge on him tomorrow and force him to wear something hideous and pink. But it would all be worth it. Sweeney smiled darkly as another customer sat down cheerfully in the chair, unaware that he would never see another Valentine's Day.

Sweeney woke the next morning to the sound of Mrs. Lovett singing a rather sappy ballad about Romeo and Juliet. Groaning, he flopped out of bed. He squinted around the room, checking to see if Mrs. Lovett had visited during the night with ribbons and roses. Sighing with relief that that nightmare, at least, would not come true, Sweeney dressed and then dragged himself to the front of the pie emporium.

"Good morning, love!" Mrs. Lovett said cheerily. "'Ungry? I've just made a fresh batch of pies. Would ya like one?"

Without waiting for his consent, she pushed a rather lumpy pie across the counter towards him. "Well?" she said excitedly, her foot tapping. "Wot do ya think?"

Sweeney stared at the hideous _thing_ that was sitting on a chipped china plate in front of him. There was an odd crease in one side, and another side had a rather lopsided point. His stomach gave a funny twisting leap as he realized that it was supposed to be shaped like a heart.

"Um," he said stupidly.

Before he could say anything more, Mrs. Lovett squealed and clapped her hands. "Oh, I almost forgot- I've got you a _present_!" she said happily as she raced out the room. She turned for a moment and called, "You stay right there, love, an' eat your breakfast!"

Sweeney wrinkled his nose and poked at the gray lump on his plate. If he didn't hurry up and get it over with now, she would force-feed him later. Pinching his nose, he gulped a bite of the pie down. It wasn't half-bad. He managed to finish the pie by the time Mrs. Lovett returned, grinning from ear to ear.

"'Ere ya go, love, just a little somfin' I put together for ya. 'Urry an' open it, now!"

Sweeney watched amusedly as she tapped her foot impatiently. Slowly, he undid the lopsided pink bow and peeled away the shiny red paper. Inside the package he found a small white handkerchief. Embroidered neatly in red thread on the bottom left corner was the name, " Sweeney Todd".

He realized that Mrs. Lovett had made this for him by herself. Sweeney couldn't help but a feel a certain fondness for her when he thought of how hard she must of worked to get it done in time.

"It's lovely, thank you, Mrs. Lovett."

She beamed and flung her arms around his neck, chattering away. "You can just keep it right 'ere, in your pocket, nice and neat-like. All proper gennelmen 'ave 'em now, ya know."

Sweeney stood up suddenly. "Mrs. Lovett, I will return later, but I am currently needed in my shop."

Mrs. Lovett blushed and said quickly, "Of course, love, you go take care of your business. I'll just stay 'ere quiet-like and make my pies."

He nodded curtly and made his way up the stairs. It was not long before a customer arrived at the shop. He was toting an oddly shaped package. "Good morning, sir. What can I do for you?" Sweeney asked pleasantly.

"Just a shave, if ya don' mind. I've got ter 'urry to market to sell my loot."

The customer jerked a dirty thumb at the package he had laid down on the table by the door. Sweeney noticed that it was red and had curly writing on it.

"What is it?"

"Jus' a box of chocolates ter sell. It bein' Valentine's Day an' all means I'll get a right good price for 'em."

"I'm sure. Now just lean back and-"

It was over in a second. Sweeney slashed at the man's throat. The man flailed around for a moment, sending blood everywhere, before finally slumping over, unnaturally still. Quickly Sweeney sent him flying down to the bakehouse, where Mrs. Lovett could deal with him later.

He glanced around the room and winced. The flailing man's blood was now all over everything in the shop- including the barber. Sighing in exasperation, Sweeney set to cleaning up the mess. When he finished, he noticed the box of chocolates sitting there, covered in now dry blood. He stared at it for a moment before an idea popped into his head.

Clutching the box to him, he marched into the pie shop and roared, "Mrs. Lovett!"

The baker raced in, strands of hair flopping out of her already messy hairstyle.

"Wot is it, love?"

He thrust the bloody box into her hands. She stared at it for a moment, taking in the curly lettering under the blood, before beaming up at him. He scowled and said, "Happy bloody Valentine's Day, Mrs. Lovett."

**A/N: Voila! Hope you enjoyed it. nn I know I enjoyed writing it.**


End file.
